Lucky

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend.
Lucky to have been where I have been.
Lucky to be coming home again.
Lucky we're in love in every way. 
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed.

 Ten years ago today, I married my perfect match.

I will be the very first to tell you that I am only mediocre at the romantics.  Flowers are nice every once in a while; however, love manifests for me in so many other forms:

Standing at the altar, promising to love and to cherish.

Honoring that promise during that first rocky year.

Promising we were in it together when our infertility was finally diagnosed as "my" problem.

Rejoicing with me four years later when we learned we were pregnant.

Holding me up when my heart was collapsing due to the loss of our first son.

Loving me through my fear when we learned our second child was on the way.

Making me proud when he took his oath of citizenship.

Crying with joy when we heard and saw Z's heartbeat for the first time.

Attending EVERY doctor's appointment with me.

Worrying about me to himself but only showing me strength.

Crying right along with me as our son cried his way into the world.

Rejoicing with me in our ups.

Standing firmly with me in our downs.

In the end, there is one resounding force behind it all: love.

Cliche as it might sound, I have been blessed to find the love of a lifetime.  I know how lucky I am to have been gifted with this time with my husband, and I take not even one second for granted.

The last ten years have been the best of my life.  My husband and I have grown over the years.  We have grown wiser.  Grown separately as people.  Grown as parents.  And most importantly, we have grown together.

So today, I rejoice in the day we went from him and me to us.  I am looking forward to every other second we are granted together.

I cannot wait to see what each one brings us.

You People

Yesterday was my 7th anniversary with The Company.  That makes it, to date, the longest I have been with any single employer.  Of course, at just over 30, that isn't really saying much.

When I first started with The Company, it was a job.  I had been unemployed for a lengthy amount of time and for a few months prior, had been selling computers to businesses as a temporary job (that's a whole other blog post).  I went into The Company with the idea that it would get us by until I could start school and eventually teach (college level ONLY).

In the early days, I remember cringing any time I heard the infamous "You People."  That phrase was normally followed by "messed up my bill," "are lying to me,"or "are the spawn of Satan." At this point, I have heard just about everything, been called just about everything, and have been threatened with just about everything.  There is very little that surprises me.

In those days, being called on of "those people" would set my teeth on edge.  I couldn't understand why I was being berated for something that I didn't do.  I wanted to know why I was bearing the chastisement for errors (either technical or human).

At some point, however, I began to take a different approach.  I learned that for most people, seeing an error is just the straw.  Life has been throwing curve balls left and right and a billing problem or technical issue is just the last thing they need.  The frustration and anger just begin to build to the point where they are unable to contain it any longer.  And then they call us.  They do so without considering the tips for a successful customer service interaction.

But I am a firm believer that I cannot control the world, only my reaction to others in it.  I don't normally get upset by the treatment, I simply endure it.  It comes with the territory when you are one of "those people."

And it is no longer a job.  It is a career.  I love working for The Company (most days).  I love what I do (again, most days).

And, at this point, I am proud to be one of "Those People."

The Love Boat

As of today, I have exactly one month before I can no longer change this cruise (at least, not without dishing out more money).  We have made the final decision (I think), but the details are still driving me insane.

I am fairly sure I have previously mentioned my issues with OCD.  Trip planning is not free from this problem.  You would think that because it is a vacation, I would be able to relax, go with the flow, and let the details handle themselves.

Yeah, right.

I am SO not a "go with the flow" kind of person.  I need order, I need schedules, and I need plans.  Simply allowing things to take care of themselves both unnerves me and sends the OCD into overdrive.  I then begin to obsess about all of the things that are not going to be done while I am gone.

I am seriously trying to remember that this is the celebration of the most wonderful decade of my life.  It is a celebration of the ups and downs, trials and triumphs, losses and gains. It is the celebration of overcoming the odds of a multicultural, biracial family and thriving in our mixed up life.  And with that, I know it will all be okay. We have endured infertility, infant loss, fights, and frustrations.  What's a free-flying vacation compared to that?

Will it be perfect and go off without a hitch?  Probably not. After all, our wedding didn't.  Very little has, to be quite honest.

But will it be amazing and relaxing?  Yep:  if I allow it to be.  And I am determined to let it.

Just as soon as I finalize the booking.