Thursday, June 2, 2011

The Journey of a Thousand Miles

"...begins with a single step."


For the last few days, that single step has felt like it is in quicksand and the journey has never felt longer.

I am going to be honest...I feel off the wagon.  No, it's probably more accurate to say that I willingly jumped off the wagon while it was still in motion.

On Friday, a follow up appointment didn't go as planned.  I hadn't expected to hear great things, but I also didn't expect to get news that puts some plans on the back burner of a stove in China.

Based on that, I have fallen into bad habits.  I really didn't care much about what I ate this weekend.  If it appealed to me, I had it.  Wings? Yep.  Dessert? Sure.  It was emotional eating, I know.

And I really didn't care.

On the heels of several days of caution to the wind noshing, a work email caught my attention.  Our Wellness Center will be having a Biggest Loser contest.  While I am feeling like the Biggest Loser right now, that's not quite what they have in mind.

I thought back to this same contest from two years ago.  Two years ago, I was on the team that won this very contest.  I was committed and really, really worked to do so.   There were other people counting on me to succeed.

While I am not necessarily a competitive person by nature, I am very much dedicated to the team spirit.  I don't want to disappoint anyone or be the one factor that could cause us to miss a goal.  I also want to do it for me, to prove that I am not a quitter...I am NOT a loser.

So, while the journey is still feels endless, and my feet still feel leaden and burdened, I am pushing on.

One step at a time.

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